I do apologize Motherhood, but I need to interrupt you for just a moment.
Or maybe even a little longer.
Please don’t be offended. I’d never, ever break up with you. You’re a part of me, and even though it’s not always the best part, I love you!
But considering all of the times that you’ve interrupted me, I believe you need to take a longggg time out.
Remember that time when I didn’t have to get up to rush the littlest to the potty just in time, or find the oldest’s library book ten seconds before the school bus arrived?
Yeah, me either.
So if I could hit the ‘pause’ button and have you wait patiently in the corner, maybe I could tackle a few things like:
Finish unpacking from our move six months ago.
This will get done even with you hanging around…someday. But if you were on hiatus, I could find a home for all the girls’ toys, right my (shared) closet so that hubby doesn’t accidentally wear my socks to work, and finally unpack ALL of the wine glasses so they’re in their proper place, where I can find them at any time. We all know Mommy needs to know where those wine glasses are.
Research or actually begin a program to get my college degree.
Yes, this is definitely a regret, not finishing college after high school. And I know it isn’t your fault. You weren’t even around then! I did get a year and a half in. The husband and I have made a good living for our family without the benefit of this accomplishment. In part, it is probably because we did not have student loan debt. Yes, I admit I still do not know exactly what I want to be when I grow up. But devoting myself to this task would be a worthy one, and it seems impossible while working full time and raising our girls. So if you’re willing to sit idly by for awhile, I’m ready and eager to learn.
Drink an entire cup of coffee or eat a meal while they are still hot.
Can we play a game? I spilled something. I’m hungry. I’m thirsty. Look what I made! Can we go outside? I’m hungry. Can we go back in? It never ends. I’ve let the dog in and out three times just since starting this list. Even the fur kids are in on this Motherhood test. When the 90 pound dog comes in the house covered in snow, there’s a drying off phase that includes wrestling moves and an enormous beach towel that smells so awful. A mom might not have invented the microwave, but you can bet many of us proffer thanks to this contraption daily for saving our dinner from landing in the trash can on top of that dog-drying towel.
Have some alone time with the husband for more than three hours.
I am so thankful to have a guy that understands the importance of keeping “us” a priority. Some day it’ll just be him and I again, staring at each other wondering where the days with our little ones went. He agrees when that time comes, it’s important that we still like each other. There are times, though, that dinner and a movie just doesn’t cut it. Maybe we weren’t really connecting, or maybe I was exhausted when date night rolled around. With Motherhood taking her own vacation, just think of all the opportunities! A last minute three day road trip? No problem! Of course it is entirely probable that, as soon as the first bag is unpacked, we will share videos or photos of the kids from our phones and talk about how much we miss them.
Enjoy more time alone.
I consider myself lucky that typically, I can use the bathroom without my kids barging through the door. I know that many Moms do not have this luxury. But there are other things that I would welcome without Mom Duty calling. Like being able to binge-watch five episodes of a non-animated, profanity littered show. Or read an entire book in one sitting. Take a day to finally decide if I really like Yoga. Use that massage gift certificate I got months ago. Plan a month of “clean eating”. I try to sneak these splurges in anyway, but it would be far easier to take care of me without worrying about you.
I realize I’ve committed myself to you.
I know I am blessed with my children. You, Motherhood, are the one thing that I will be able to say I’m following through with. The major accomplishment that is just mine, rewarding me more than anything else I might have done without you.
So I’ll stick with you, Motherhood. For better or worse. But if you find yourself stuffed in the trunk once in awhile on this crazy ride, I promise it’s only temporary. I hope you’ll forgive me for the interruption.